photo credit: ken mccown

“Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step.” Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Pour a cup of coffee, kick back, because I think this is going to be another long winded post.

In my early twenties I was introduced to the writings of an old curmudgeon by the name of Charles Bukowski, whose simple beat style prose intrigued me.  Hank, as he was known by friends, family and fans, was “blogging” well before the net was invented by the US government in the 1970’s.  Hank could take some of the simplest things in life and through his writing he would make them interesting.  He didn’t seem to get caught up in the fluff of writing, he just wrote about what he did, what he saw, what he smelled, and what he tasted.

I spent an entire summer learning from Bukowski’s writings.  It was as if everything I wrote could be titled, “A study in ____ .” Of course you fill in the blank.  I had hundreds of pieces of paper, scraps even, whatever I could find where I wrote about things like filling up my gas tank that afternoon, driving to work, or cleaning my bedroom.

What I had learned during this time was that talents are like muscles, if you don’t use them, they tend to atrophy and grow weak, but if you did use them, the pump that is your mind, was always primed, and thoughts and ideas flowed freely.  This time in my life was one of my more prolific times.  There were many nights where I spent hours over state of the art technology like an electric typewriter riffing like a jazz pianist hopped up on reefer in a 1930’s anti-drug movie.  These writings ranged from prose, to poetry, to Dennis Miller like ponderings that I was sending off to friends across the states.  I’m sad to say that I have since lost every single piece of writing from that period.  Whether or not my old friends still have those letters I sent I don’t know.  I haven’t spoken to any of them in years, and don’t have much hope.  I apologize, I am getting to a point but it will take some time to get there.

I have written here on my blog in the past about my inability to get from A-Z by going through the smaller steps like a to b, to c, to d.  I would rather skip the whole process and just go straight to the end of the line.  It is because of this lack of patience I haven’t completed certain short stories that I have begun, among other projects.  But in the last week or so I have been inspired to journal again.

Now when I say journal, this is something completely different than my blog.  I purchased a journal at Wal-Mart that is now filling up with ideas, questions, and inspired thoughts.  One person that inspired me to do this was my father.  My dad has been buying me journals for years but I have never used a single one.  I still have them all packed away somewhere.  What I came to realize was that my dad, who is an amazing writer, has compiled a number of books (unpublished for now) by combining thoughts, and poems written over many years.  Sometimes it takes a lot of work to penetrate this hard skull of mind with one of the most simple concepts like, I don’t have to write an entire novel in one evening.

As I said, the thoughts are flowing, some of it may get posted here, most probably will not.  But as I sat outside for lunch today I filled up three pages in my journal, and something hit me, it was recognizing the next step I need to take in life.  It was such an inspired moment it hit me right between the eyes so hard that I wrote at the bottom of the page.  “This is the next step.”

I am doing my best in life to walk my preach and just keep taking those steps in faith, knowing that there will be another one to follow leading me upward to achieving my goals.

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