God planned the strength and beauty of youth to be physical. But the strength and beauty of age is spiritual. We gradually lose the strength and beauty that is temporary so we’ll be sure to concentrate on the strength and beauty that is forever. –Robertson McQuilkin

Today I am grateful for pharmacologists, because getting old sucks.

Over the last ten plus years that I have been working out of my home, I let myself go, just a bit. My work days mainly consisted of sitting for hours in an office chair in front of a computer screen, while either typing, or reaching into a bag of whatever the snack of the hour was on my desk. To say my muscles have atrophied, well, let me just put it this way. At one point, Stephen Hawking’s muscles were more developed than mine, and he’s a quadraplegic.

This week I went from going to bed at four or five in the morning, to going to work at 4:30 am, and then actually becoming engaged in physical activity for over eight hours. This activity includes bending, reaching, standing, walking, and the most laborious of activities of them all, thinking.

It is because of the wonders of medicine, I have been able to successfully make it through my first week without my body collapsing within itself like some distant supernova. I take melatonin to go to bed, to wake up I consume a liquid supplement that serves two purposes, not only does it guarantee energy for five hours, but it helps to make me alert so I can remember how many shots of mocha syrup goes into that guys “Venti, 1/2 caf, Hazelnut, non-fat, 2 splenda, extra hot, latte.”

Then there is the pain that shoots directly from the concrete floor, through the one inch rubber mats, through the padded soles in my slip resistant restaurant shoes, past the extra Dr. Scholls cusion, up my legs and back, then deep into my brain, that I am able to somewhat mask by using the naproxen I was able to score from my local legal drug dealer.

This is why today, I am grateful for pharmacologists. Because without the advances in pharmacology that they have made throughout the years, I would feel much older than I do now.

Something tells me, tomorrow, I’ll be grateful for days off.

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