I know God will not give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish that He didn’t trust me so much. ~Mother Teresa
I apologize up front, this morning will be one of my more lengthy posts, if you choose not to read it all, I understand, this blog is my outlet, and it is very therapeutic for me.
I have had maybe two “bad days,” in almost three months, that to me is amazing, when all I could remember allowing myself in the past, was just bad days. I speak often about my job, because right now, that is what I mainly experience, and I speak about how I love it. I still do, but yesterday, I feel I was truly put to the test.
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I edited most of this post, because honestly I could not find how it would benefit me, or anybody else to read.
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Yes I am bitching and moaning and I do apologize, I am trying to get to a point. As I have said often, I love my job, but I truly felt like I was being tested yesterday, and I don’t think I passed. I allowed outside influences to control my happiness.
I took on this job for a variety of reasons, sure I needed the money, but more importantly I did it for my ego. I needed a job, something I had obtained on my own, without asking for anyone’s help. But I also needed to come to terms with being a 41 year old man who has owned his own business, been one of the top producing managers for Taco Bell, worked in the commercial / film industry, and am now making essentially minimum wage. I needed to push my ego out of the way, and get my ass to work.
So why am I grateful for trust? Because I trust that I am where I am at for a reason, and I will learn whatever lessons there are to learn. I trust that the Universe will open up to me, soon, and will inspire me once again, to transcend where I am at financially. I also trust that in the mean time, I will continue to be grateful for having this job, and that no matter what, I will not allow anyone to take my gratitude from me.
Once again I apologize for including any negativity in a post. I wanted people to see that it’s not all peaches and cream, and that I am not perfect, that I am like everyone else reading this blog, a human being, who is prone to making mistakes. I guess the lesson to learn from all of this, is to just continue to press forward in faith, while finding your gratitude, and keep smiling. As they say, every day on this side of the grass, is a good day.
